My boyfriend’s ‘girlfriend’ is very jealous

Dear Pastor,

I am a 17-year-old girl and I am living at home with my sister and three brothers.

My parents are professionals and they have always told us to study hard. Every day my parents look through our books. They helped us with our schoolwork. We were not allowed to spend a long time looking at television. On Saturdays, we had time to look at cartoons; sometimes our parents joined us.

As children we used to play school. One of my brothers was the principal and he was strict. He would even threaten to beat us when we did not conduct ourselves well. We had lots of fun. Sometimes we played church and my sister was a nun and one of my brothers acted as a priest. We even took up offering, so I was the usher and the treasurer. We had lots of fun as children.

When I was 16, I had my first kiss with a boy. It happened right in one of the classes at school. He didn't ask me for the kiss, but when he held me and kissed me, I did not object because I always liked him. Some of my classmates cheered us and I pretended as if I was vexed. I told him I was going to report him, but I didn't. He asked me what am I going to report him for and I told him for kissing me. He said he would like to do it again, so that I would have something to really talk about.

This guy and I grew to love each other. He went abroad to study and he called me almost every day. One day I got a call from a girl and she said that she wanted me to know that she and my friend have been dating, but he is always talking about me. I called him and told him that I would prefer if he not discuss me with his girlfriend. He said she is just jealous and she is always asking about me. She went into his phone and saw my number, but he did not give her permission to call me. I still love this guy and I would like us to get married.

Both of us are still young, so I don't know where this relationship is going. I sometimes go out in groups from my church, but I don't get too close to other guys. Do you think my boyfriend is talking the truth? I am longing to see him.

A.M.

Dear A.M.,

Let this friendship remain in your heart. Don't allow it to go to your head. It may cause you to go crazy.

You have had a good upbringing. Your parents have really tried with your siblings and you. Don't do anything in life that will bring disgrace on your parents, your siblings and yourself.

This young man who kissed you was showing his love for you. However he should not have done so without your consent. Your classmates laughed at what he did. School can be real fun, so those in your form knew that you all were just having clean fun.

The girl that your boyfriend is seeing is indeed jealous of him and she believes that you are standing in her way. Pray for your boyfriend and hope that he will remain strong and not allow any girl to trip him up and destroy his life. The love that he has for you will get stronger, so please play your cards right, so to speak.

Pastor